This has to be written.
I read an article about porn...In this particular article, the author left a quote from Jennifer Laurence, and it said this,
"I was in a loving, healthy, great relationship for four years. It was long distance, and either your boyfriend is going to look at porn or he’s going to look at you.”
There are two "truths" that can be pulled from her statement.
1. All men use porn, it's a normal part of living, duh
2. If you want to keep the person you love, and you don't want them to use porn, you send them naked pictures of yourself, duh
Of course, all sorts of comments followed the article, mostly ones like these:
"So why is porn bad? Ohh that's right because some people, mainly women believe if a man is even looking at another woman he must be straying. Nope, not even close. You've watched porn right? Do you actually remember their name, do you constantly think about the actress or is she just an idea"
"There's a simple fact in all this. Do things for you. Don't ever hurt others for what you do or like. SIMPLE. Love life and spread love! To each there own , cause why? We all got all our own opinions and style! "
Be wary, because my heart has caught on fire...
Dear loved ones,
I wish I could open the eyes and hearts of men, and I could carry a lantern to the darkest parts in their heart, and leave a light there. I wish I could eradicate porn with a blog. I wish like the men and women who stood during the civil rights movement, hid Jewish families in their attics during the Holocaust, and waged war against sweat shops, I could spark the start of a movement against a movement...against the norm.
But the world is a big place, and from History, I know that it takes generations before one generation can finally look back and say, "that was a wicked, terrible thing, and should have never happened." I also know that there has yet to be a generation to resist the temptation to claim stake and defile women's bodies.
Porn places women's bodies on pretty pedestals, billboards, and magazines like dinner served on a table. It looks delicious, harmless, and inviting, but here's the thing, we weren't made to be consumed, used, or served on a platter, and you should know it. It was never, and will never, be justifiable.
I hope that when or if your boyfriend ever puts you in a corner, with hungry eyes, and a plate...you leave. You're body is not something for him to devour. It's not something for him to take from you.
I don't care what anyone says or believes, you should never have to compromise your heart or body because of the carnivorous appetite porn creates in men. And you certainly shouldn't have to rely on it to keep him.
I hope you're treasured and valued. I hope you never have to debate, argue, or convince him that porn has the power to beak your heart, and steal his away from yours. I hope you'll talk to him about it, forgive him, and help him when he needs it. I hope you pray for him, fight for him, and believe in him. But if he doesn't understand, and he doesn't listen, and he has no regard for your heart, I hope your strong enough to leave.
Your heart is a fierce, wild thing...and it has never, and will never, belong in a cage.
To men,
She isn't being possessive, emotional, or controlling when she doesn't want you to use porn, she's begging you to love her and not the woman on your screen. It may be just a face, an idea or a fantasy, but to the woman who loves you, it's a woman who's sexier, prettier, and more desirable than she is.
The Beatles sang "all you need is love," not "all you need is sex" for a reason. And I did just go there.
with much love.
